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--- Backyard Soccer (http://board.bosart.eu/thread.php?threadid=42)


Posted by Morfe22 on 06-01-2010 at16:21:

  Backyard Soccer

I found this to be another enjoyable and light-hearted romp featuring poor, hapless Canan, (who can never seem to get a break) and also sees the introduction of wildcat farm girl Amy to the Fantomaz universe.

The story itself is very straightforward and a fleshing out of an incident that first appeared as Canan's embarrassing moment in her original e-portfolio. The main tickling protagonists are the very cute (and very provocatively attired!) Gabrielle, Sophie (who always seems to be at the centre of any tickling action...usually because she starts it!) and ultimately just about everyone else at the soccer game gets involved, including another member of Sophie's infamous tickle gang, Romina.

Of the two ticklees, Canan needs no introduction as this shy, submissive cutie has been on the receiving end of many tickling fingers over the past few months so I won't dwell overly on her, other than to say its once again fun to see that every time she tries to do something positive and come out of her shell, she always ends up embarrassed and laughing her head off. One can only hope the poor girl will have a change of fortune at some point and be the one dishing it out rather than being on the receiving end.

Wildcat Amy I like very much. A spunky, confident farmgirl who grew up with 5 brothers (once can only imagine the ticklish childhood endured by our Southern heroine) who attempts to come to Canan's rescue but soon finds herself laughing it up alongside her. I think Amy is really cute, I loved her attitude and her outfit looked great. The suntan shade nylons were perfect for her. And from an evil point of view, its always fun to see a good girl tickled silly by naughty girls for trying to do the right thing!

The gang tickle scenario worked very well and the use of the bin to restrain Amy was creative and amusing. The dialogue was of its usual entertaining standard, and I particularly enjoyed Sophie's verbal taunting of our stubborn wildcat. There was the odd typo, but nothing to ruin the enjoyment of the story. The tickling action was also what we have come to expect of a Fantomaz comic, with interesting multiple angle shots and plenty of images. The story pace feels just about right, with a reasonably sprightly build up leaving lots of pages for the tickle action. And once again, the backgrounds, scenery and props help to create a totally believable story.

I very much hope that we see more of Amy and that she wreaks her revenge on her cruel tormentors. From a personal point of view, i'd love to see Romina worked over as I have a hunch that she would break fairly easily and maybe give up some interesting information about how to get Sophie.....

So in summary, another very enjoyable and entertaining outing for the girls. The best compliment I can pay is that once again it seemed to end all too soon and I was left wanting more.

Morfe.



Posted by Mandrake on 06-02-2010 at09:20:

 

Just completed my proofread of this comic and added some text of my own so be sure to download it once fantomaz puts it up.



Posted by fantomaZ on 06-05-2010 at13:53:

 

there was a harsh comment about this e-comic on one of the tickling forums concerning the quality of Canan's stockings. very embarrassing as I just didn't notice that they really were to loose fitting in close up pics. technically this is due to the base model which is an older one than the V4 generation. so usually I don't go as close to V3 stockings as I do with V4 stockings. my fault to be so distracted by the action around Canan. anyway I didn't want to leave it that way so I bought some new stockings for Canan and rerendered the whole e-comic. I attach 2 close up pics where you can compare the quality of v1.0 and v2.0

of course updates to v2.0 are free for all who bought v1.0

greetz fantomaZ



Posted by Morfe22 on 06-05-2010 at18:35:

 

If it is of any consolation, whilst the revamp obviously looks better I certainly didn't feel that the original version in any way detracted or distracted from the enjoyment of the story. I didn't notice any issue when reading through the first version.

It's always different when looking specifically at a couple of individual pictures, which is always going to highlight and amplify any perceived flaws in the images compared to running through a publication in its entirety where there is an awful lot to see and for the eyes to enjoy.

So don't beat yourself up over one negative comment. Its just a shame people arent a bit more forthcoming with positive comments sometimes as quite frankly some of the images you have come up with, and im thinking particularly of the Hotel comic, are among some of the best i've ever seen.

And of course, the fact that you went through and re-rendered is to your credit and certainly looks fantastic Smile



Posted by Mandrake on 06-06-2010 at19:50:

 

Yeah, I wouldn't worry too much about Ilohnoh's comment. He is also an artist, and has received a lot of criticism on his work, but he takes it constructively. I'm sure he was just doing the same.

The somewhat loose looking nylons never bothered me, because they never really looked loose to me, more like they were bolded and highlighted, and you do kind of see that sort of highlighted effect on nylons in real life, although not quite as exaggerated. It actually looks pretty cool, but the hq model nylons are definitely an improvement.



Posted by fantomaZ on 06-07-2010 at16:13:

 

thanks for your support. if v2.0 is an improvement I am happy with it.

I took the criticism constructively. the only annoying thing was that I didn't realize it myself. but each and every critic just makes my work better as I take all that very seriously.



Posted by TeeHeeLawrence on 06-21-2010 at08:08:

  Poor, poor Canan!

Hey!
Has anyone asked Canan HER opinion of the rendering of her stockings?
I would think that more snugly fitting nylons would make her tickling all the more mirth-making!
But, seriously, fantomaZ, I'm sure that I'm hardly alone in applauding your ceaseless attention to detail. Such detail elevates craft to--Dare I say?--art (Gasp!)



Posted by fantomaZ on 06-21-2010 at11:56:

Big Grin

Canan begged me to let her wear thick woolen pantyhose and doc martens boots for once but I refused ... maybe the ticklish richterscale will have to be redefined for poor ticklish Canan Big Grin


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