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Posted by grizzletoad1 on 05-31-2017 at22:47:

  Reworking My Novel

Hi guys. I guess you already know I've been reworking my novel, The Railroad Man, for some time now, trying to put out a final "Writer's Cut" edition. Wonder what you think of this very brief passage from my story. It's where Laura, my one-shoed, hat-loving heroine, has defiantly walked into the railroad's roundhouse despite Mike warning her not to. It's kind of a neat little scene:

She walked deeper into the roundhouse now, unhurried, looking around at the structure with her hands clasped behind her. Her bare left foot felt warm and comfortable, fully shielded from the harsh, filthy concrete floor by the bandage and thick cardboard flap Mike had given her. She stepped tiptoed with it as she walked, it’s near-silent footfall alternating with the sharp click the heel her lone shoe made, tapping out an irregularly-spaced cadence that echoed through the empty quietness—“ka-lick…ka-lick…ka-lick….� In a strange way, she was starting to like it, feeling at once alluring and vulnerable, yet strong and defiant.


Your thoughts?

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Posted by Mandrake on 06-02-2017 at17:07:

  RE: Reworking My Novel

I like it.